Someone Like You

Usher is actually quite clear in this song. He tells the new girl:
“I know it’s so unfair to you
That I relate her ignorance to you,
Wish I knew how to separate the two”

He acknowledges that he should be able to distinguish the new from the old, but he’s honest enough to admit that he’s not there yet. Forgiveness, healing, and moving on are all processes. If they are rushed, someone is bound to get hurt. Rather than make the new woman pay for the mistakes of the last, he’s upfront by saying that the he can’t take the next step.

Sometimes we (particularly those romantics among us) want to change people’s minds. We believe they should see things the way we do, we expect them to be in the same place we are, we try to convince them to take chances, we try to force them to fight. But how ridiculous is that?

If someone looks at you and can only see the face of the person who broke their heart, that’s simply where they are at that point in time/life/love. They may want to see you for you, but in that moment, they simply cannot. Maybe they have not healed from the previous heartbreak or gotten over the other person. Maybe it can all be chalked up to bad timing. Maybe things will change, maybe they won’t. Maybe the person, knowing they are presently unable to love you, is right in choosing to graciously fall back.

As naïve and hopelessly romantic as it may sound, I still believe that one day a man will fight for me. However, provided no vows have been exchanged, there will be no hard feelings if he instead chooses to declare it “another love T.K.O.”

Sometimes we expect things to go another way. In fact, we want things to go another way. But they don’t. Such is life.

But keep living. Eventually someone will come along, and they’ll be looking for someone like you.

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